How the Princess Got Her Name:

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

Hello everyone.

I had an assignment for Creative writing class to write a narrative poem (that did not rhyme) and this was what came out. Please note that it is my first poem and insanely long so you don't have to read it. This is for those of you bored like mad and waiting for something to read because the other ljers aren't online.

I kind of imagined it being one of the stories someone tells in the Books but in a different era and not nearly as good.

Ehm anyway -- here it is.

How the Princess Got Her Name:
A Fairy Tale in Sixteen Stanzas

“The day the King and Queen had their firstborn,
The kingdom radiated with triumph;
The ten year war with the terrible Tyconians
Had finally been won.
The prince was called Calhoun, or “Warrior,”
After all the men who had so valiantly fought.

Some winters later, three shooting stars graced the midnight sky
When their eldest daughter came forth.
It’s said that the celestial lights were reaching to earth
To look more closely at her unparalleled beauty,
Hence her parents named her Brea,
Meaning “Beauty beyond Sight.”

One year later, a third child was born to the King and Queen.
Nothing of interest whatsoever must have happened
Because the parents named her Twila, or “third,”
Since she was the third child born to them.
Creative, were they not?

Princess Twila spent many restless nights
In anxious vexation over the repute of her name,
Or rather, lack thereof.
Despite her fervent efforts, neither his Majesty nor the Queen
Seemed concerned with Twila’s dilemma.
“You have a very respectable name, young lady,”
They would often remark, squinting their eyes
In a warning not to speak of it further.
Even the princess’ own siblings showed her
Little sympathy regarding the matter – being blessed
With glorious names – they could not understand the distress of her plight.

It wasn’t until one midsummer morning,
When the sun would not shine,
That Twila saw her means of redemption.
On that day, not so very long ago,
A monstrous foe emerged from the darkness.
Black and grey, with crimson fangs it lashed out – hungry
For food and ravaging all in its path.

An order went forth by decree of the King,
“Our peaceful realm has been threatened with vexation and violence.
Whoever can rid the kingdom of this ghastly creature
Shall be granted one request – whatever his heart’s desire. ”

Calhoun, eager to fulfill the role of hero for his people,
Was the first to set out against the monster.
Sword and shield in hand, he faced his opponent.
“Here, Here, vile creature! Your darkness has surrounded us long enough.
Prepare to meet your fate,” he shouted.
Unfortunately, the monster had not yet eaten that morning
And he found Prince Calhoun to be an energizing
Breakfast despite, or perhaps because of, his tart flavor.

Brea, feeling it her obligation to avenge her brother
And also indulging in various fantasizes regarding
A dress of spun gold she could win in reward,
Was the next to oppose the ogrous creature
Her tactics differed slightly from her brothers, noble as he was.
“Monster,” she cooed, “as you can see
I am a princess of unparalleled exquisiteness,
I am willing, despite my better judgment,
To give you a kiss in exchange for your promise to leave this land.”
The monster, having eaten a highly nutritious breakfast,
Was willing to pause a moment and laugh thunderously
At the girls audacity before swallowing her whole,
Enjoying the remnant of sweet taste in his mouth.

Seeing that they had lost their two eldest children
To the stomach of the monster
The King and Queen were quite distraught.
Unwilling to risk their last heir,
They forbid Twila from facing the beast.
“You are too young, little one, we won’t allow it,” they insisted.
Princess Twila, however, could not ignore her one chance for recognition.

The monster, full from his prior meals, indulged himself
In a peaceful doze, dreaming of the savor and variance of human delicacies.
It was in this state of serene slumber that he was rather awkwardly awakened.
Princess Twila, having traveled quite a distance to meet her opponent and eager
To begin her challenge, clustered the monster’s eyelids in her palms,
Lifting them upward, she stared at his pupils, wide eyed.
“Sir Monster, are you awake?” she asked impatiently,
“I’ve brought you a gift.”
The Beast, anxious to blink, pushed the Princess away roughly.
Undeterred, she smoothed her dress and began again,
“You are likely aware that your breakfast and brunch consisted of
My very dear siblings and I must admit I’m quite irritated.
I realize though that you are a hungry soul
and need nutrition in much the same way I do.
Although I much prefer food of a more succulent source,”
she said, pointing to a large mound of red spheres
she had carted in on her journey.
The creature laughed at the little princess, rocking himself back and forth,
“Do you really think a few apples could tie me over?
They certainly shant prevent me from having my fill of lunch,”
He raised his eyebrows at the Princess suggestively.

“My dear Sir,” replied the princess, chin raised, her arms crossed
and eyes narrowed in a look she had gleaned from her parents,
“If after you’ve heard the terms of my wager you disagree,
you are welcome to eat me – and everyone else in our land.”
The monster, knowing very few persons, beyond those whom he consumed,
Rarely had the opportunity to enjoy entertainment
and thus resigned himself to at least listen to the strange little girl.
“I propose a battle of wits,” she continued,
“If you can correctly answer this riddle,
the kingdom is yours to devour, if you cannot, you must leave and never come back.”
The monster, being somewhat intrigued at the prospect of limitless meals
without the hassle of pesty so-called heroes, was up to the challenge.

“Good,” Twila said, “the question is simple.
Which is the greater folly – to be uninteresting or uneffective?”
The monster scrunched his hideous plank of a nose,
this was not what he’d expected.
Minutes passed with the monster deep in thought.
Twila, never known for her patience, made her way to the wheelbarrow.
The monster, distracted by her movement and hungry
from all the theories in his head, snatched the apple
from her hand before she could sink her teeth into it.
Twila merely snorted in irritation and sat on the ground
crossed legged awaiting the creature’s response.
“I’ve got it!” he finally cried.
To be inefficient is to be human, unfortunate but common.
To be boring is a crime against the living – intolerable and unacceptable



Princess Twila could not help but sigh at the irony;
the first person to take her side and
truly empathize with her position was an evil villain.
The monster was chuckling at his own cleverness
when suddenly his eyes grew wide, and his throat closed on him.
“Aerck! Achk!” he grabbed his throat in pain.
The princess watched as he stumbled in a daze
and finally fell forward in a plop, dead.
Shaking her head, she remarked, more to herself than the lifeless creature,
“Your appetite has made you forget the cardinal rule:
The apples are always laced with poison.”
She reached for the sword her brother had dropped
on his way into the belly of the beast and sliced its torso with a gentle sweep.

Light lit the afternoon sky and
The Kingdom was aglow with gratitude and pride,
As the Princess made her way through a victory march in her honor.
Even Calhoun and Brea, grateful to be out of the dark sticky cell
that held them, were willing to look past the embarrassment
of having been out witted by their baby sister.
The King and Queen embraced their progeny with joyous hearts.
As the court filtered into the room, His majesty gave the Princess a small pat on her back,
“So, Twila, what will you ask in reward for your heroic yet disobedient act?”
his eyes shone with a mixture of relief and jest.
The Princess, always aware of her heart’s desire, boldly replied
That what she wanted more than anything was a new and glorious name.
Not surprised, the King nodded his head briefly and pronounced with a heavy voice
“Let it be known far and wide that Princess Twila shall forever now be called
Aiden – brave slayer of villainous monsters.”
A roar erupted from the crowd and the Princess smiled in satisfaction.
Aiden, meaning “fiery,” was a truly splendid name befitting any person of importance.

It wasn’t until after signing her thirteenth letter
of apology to The Commission of Monsters and Ogres,
That Princess Aidenbraveslayerofvillainousmonsters,
truly learned her lesson:
a practical name is better than a flourishing one rich in history
and the only thing worse than a Ravenous fiend
is a father with a wicked sense of humor.

Comments

[chocolatepot.livejournal.com]

That is wonderful. I loved the twist. Reminds me of Pratchett - Note Spelling!

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

Thank you, principessa.

I'm anxious becaise I have to submit it for the entire class to critique. o_0

[chocolatepot.livejournal.com]

Heh. I just had a workshop today - with a group of five, though, not the whole class. They told me some very good things, many of which I knew already (either because I always do it or because I realized right after I printed it out) but some of which were useful to hear. Like the way I don't ever ever describe the way people look, and the way the ending was like, "action action action DONE!"

[checkers65477.livejournal.com]

I like it very, very much. I hope your class appreciates all the traditional fantasy/fairy tale elements, the subtle humor, and the fun you've put into it. I got the impression that you were writing a fantasy tale while making fun of them, especially ones that take themselves too seriously, at the same time. Loved the part about the apple alwaysbeing poison. Duh. Of course! Twila/Aiden is a great character. And the clever father, too.

[fabricalchemist.livejournal.com]

Wow! I like this! Very saucy :)

But wouldn't a more ... interesting ending be that she changed the meaning of her name, rather than her name?

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

Thanks checkers.

I don't know if the class will appreciate it -- they're a pretty tough crowd (very literary, I don't know what they're all talking about half the time). I almost wish that we didn't have to submit them anonymously because than I could explain 'see this is what I meant by this...etc.'

But it's ok. It was fun to do and I guess that's all that matters, really.

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

Thanks, bear.

But wouldn't a more ... interesting ending be that she changed the meaning of her name, rather than her name?

Hmn... THat would be cool, I hadn't thought of that. Any ideas as to what her name could alternatively mean? Originally, when asking my friend for inspiration she suggested I write her a story about a girl with the name Aiden. This story-poem-verse-thing came from me trying to eventually get to that name.

Also, the meanings I included in the story are the actual meanings of the names (atleast according to Babynames.com).

If I did what you suggest it would certainly make it a more moral story instead of the strange sardonic fluff I turned it into. Definitely something for me to think about. :)

I could make it so that the name Twila becomes a new vocabulary word in their language associated with cleverness and gallantry... The wheels in my brain are tolling away.

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

"action action action DONE!"? Sounds like my kind of story. ;)

[fabricalchemist.livejournal.com]

Well, you could always make her name Aiden to begin with :)

I could make it so that the name Twila becomes a new vocabulary word in their language associated with cleverness and gallantry

That's an excellent articulation of what I was trying to say :)

[fabricalchemist.livejournal.com]

I agree with Checkers -- the subtle humor is what really makes this shine...as if in not taking your story quite so seriously, you're poking a little fun at the rest of your class :)

[checkers65477.livejournal.com]

I like that idea!

[rowana.livejournal.com]

What a fantastic piece of work. I adored the ending, the sardonic tone was what made the theme successful in a way. I can think of other ways that you could have done it, but for this idea, and this ending, your language and pace feels pretty good.

The last line was particularly wonderful. :)

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

in not taking your story quite so seriously, you're poking a little fun at the rest of your class

Lol, I had never thought of it that way...

[cherryblosomjen.livejournal.com]

Thanks ROwena. That line kept haunting me until I finally put it in there.