queensthief | Let's Baffle Costis!

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AH-HAHAHAHAHAHA I CAN JUST SEE GEN DRAGGING HIM INTO A SONG AND DANCE ROUTINE WITH NO EXPLANATION AH-HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
~jade_sabre_301

The entire cast of the Queen's Thief series in the midst of a choreographed dance routine is nothing that can be banished easily from the mind.
~viviolo

INT. GEN'S ROOM.

Gen is sitting on his bed, plotting.

Gen: animated song and dance is good. Very good indeed.

EXT. SOMEWHERE OUTSIDE

Gen and Costis are doing something important-looking.

Gen: Costis!
Costis: hmmwhat?
Gen: SING WITH ME.
Costis: I don't sing, your Majesty.
Gen: ....I shall sign you up for singing lessons with Teleus.
Costis: ...what?
Gen: Shush. You're ruining my Plans.
Costis: ..er.

INT. TELEUS'S PRIVATE SINGING CLASSROOM

Teleus is standing in front of various guards, looking stern. Gen shoves Costis in.

Teleus: Let's start at the very beginning. (sighs) A very good place to start. (He scowls and walks over to the chalkboard.) When you read you begin with...

(A long pause.)

Random Soldier: A, B, C?

Teleus: (scowls) Yes. When you sing, you begin with -- (stops, looks at students expectantly. They all blink.) (Very slowly, he continues.) Do. (pause) Re. (pause) Mi. (Gesticulates at class.)

Class: Do re me.

Teleus: (while writing on chalkboard) Yes. The first three notes just happen to be, do re me.

Class: Do re me.

Teleus: Yes. Do re me fa so la tea do. Let's see if I can make this a little (sneers) easier. Do; a deer, a female deer. Re; a drop of golden sun. (He warms to the topic.) Me; a name, I call myself, Far, a long, long way to run. Sew, a needle pulling thread, la, a note to follow sew, tea, I drink with jam and bread; that will bring us back to do.

Class: ..er.

Teleus: SING WITH ME, CHILDREN.

Class & Teleus:
Do - a deer a female deer
Re - a drop of golden sun
Mi - a name I call myself
Fa - a long long way to run
Sol- a needle pulling thread
La - a note to follow so
Ti - a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do

Class:
A deer a female deer
Re - a drop of golden sun
Mi - a name I call myself
Fa - a long long way to run

Class & Teleus
Sol- a needle pulling thread
La - a note to follow so
Ti - a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do

Teleus:
Do re me fa so la ti do! Now, children, do re me fa so la ti do are the notes we use to build a song. Once you have these different bits in your head, you can sing lots of different tunes like this: so do la fa me do re. (Suddenly stern) Can you do that?

Class:
So do la fa me do re.

Teleus:
No, sing it!

Class:
(singing)
So do la fa me do re.

Teleus:
Yes. Yes indeed. (cackles evilly) er. Yes. Now you can sing. -waves hand-

Costis:
(intelligently)
But it doesn't mean anything...

Teleus:
So you just replace the words with words! (jubilantly) When you know the notes to sing, you can sing most annnnnnyyyyyythhiiiiiiing!

Costis
(to self)
Music is stupid.

He exits, LIKE A NINJA.

INT. IRENE'S BEDROOM

Inexplicably, Gen has a plate of chocolate chip cookies.

Gen (to Irene): No little shack do you share with me
We do not flee from the mortagagee
Many a care in the world have we
How can love survive?

Irene: ..WTD.

Gen (ignoring her): You're fond of earrings and you've got a lot
I'm fond of stealing and I need a yacht
Plenty of nothing we haven't got
How can love survive?
There's no rides for us on top of a carriage

Irene: That doesn't rhyme at all.

Gen: In face of political marriage

Irene: That made no sense.

Gen: hush, dearest.
You reach your goals through intelligence
When you look back upon it, there's lots of suspense
Far, far, off the the far beam are we
Quaint and bizarre as a team are we
Two kiddos with a dream are we

Irene: ..kiddos? What?

Gen: (louder) we'll make our love survive.
No little coldwater flat have we
Warmed by a glow of improbability
Up to our necks in security (vague wave towards Cosis, who isn't there)
How can love survive?

Irene blinks rapidly.

Gen: How can I show what I feel for you?

Costis blasts through the door, but his entrance is drowned out by the music.

Gen: (lightbulb above head) I shall go out and steal for you!
Irene: (snaps back) I shall die like Camille for you.
Gen: (face falls) How can love survive?

Costis: MUSIC IS STUPID.

Gen: ...I was about to have a passionate kiss with the queen, thanks a lot, Costis.
Costis: I just thought I should warn you. IT'S OUT FOR YOUR SOUL.
Gen: (nods slowly) I'll keep that in mind.

-to be continued-

The images were haunting me, so I had to write it. Except this is from the Sound of Music...BUT DON'T WORRY, it shall all be revealed in the Plot.

Let's Baffle Costis!

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