Let's Baffle Costis!
Sep. 27th, 2009 12:46 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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queensthiefAH-HAHAHAHAHAHA I CAN JUST SEE GEN DRAGGING HIM INTO A SONG AND DANCE ROUTINE WITH NO EXPLANATION AH-HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
~jade_sabre_301
The entire cast of the Queen's Thief series in the midst of a choreographed dance routine is nothing that can be banished easily from the mind.
~viviolo
INT. GEN'S ROOM.
Gen is sitting on his bed, plotting.
Gen: animated song and dance is good. Very good indeed.
EXT. SOMEWHERE OUTSIDE
Gen and Costis are doing something important-looking.
Gen: Costis!
Costis: hmmwhat?
Gen: SING WITH ME.
Costis: I don't sing, your Majesty.
Gen: ....I shall sign you up for singing lessons with Teleus.
Costis: ...what?
Gen: Shush. You're ruining my Plans.
Costis: ..er.
INT. TELEUS'S PRIVATE SINGING CLASSROOM
Teleus is standing in front of various guards, looking stern. Gen shoves Costis in.
Teleus: Let's start at the very beginning. (sighs) A very good place to start. (He scowls and walks over to the chalkboard.) When you read you begin with...
(A long pause.)
Random Soldier: A, B, C?
Teleus: (scowls) Yes. When you sing, you begin with -- (stops, looks at students expectantly. They all blink.) (Very slowly, he continues.) Do. (pause) Re. (pause) Mi. (Gesticulates at class.)
Class: Do re me.
Teleus: (while writing on chalkboard) Yes. The first three notes just happen to be, do re me.
Class: Do re me.
Teleus: Yes. Do re me fa so la tea do. Let's see if I can make this a little (sneers) easier. Do; a deer, a female deer. Re; a drop of golden sun. (He warms to the topic.) Me; a name, I call myself, Far, a long, long way to run. Sew, a needle pulling thread, la, a note to follow sew, tea, I drink with jam and bread; that will bring us back to do.
Class: ..er.
Teleus: SING WITH ME, CHILDREN.
Class & Teleus:
Do - a deer a female deer
Re - a drop of golden sun
Mi - a name I call myself
Fa - a long long way to run
Sol- a needle pulling thread
La - a note to follow so
Ti - a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do
Class:
A deer a female deer
Re - a drop of golden sun
Mi - a name I call myself
Fa - a long long way to run
Class & Teleus
Sol- a needle pulling thread
La - a note to follow so
Ti - a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do
Teleus:
Do re me fa so la ti do! Now, children, do re me fa so la ti do are the notes we use to build a song. Once you have these different bits in your head, you can sing lots of different tunes like this: so do la fa me do re. (Suddenly stern) Can you do that?
Class:
So do la fa me do re.
Teleus:
No, sing it!
Class:
(singing)
So do la fa me do re.
Teleus:
Yes. Yes indeed. (cackles evilly) er. Yes. Now you can sing. -waves hand-
Costis:
(intelligently)
But it doesn't mean anything...
Teleus:
So you just replace the words with words! (jubilantly) When you know the notes to sing, you can sing most annnnnnyyyyyythhiiiiiiing!
Costis
(to self)
Music is stupid.
He exits, LIKE A NINJA.
INT. IRENE'S BEDROOM
Inexplicably, Gen has a plate of chocolate chip cookies.
Gen (to Irene): No little shack do you share with me
We do not flee from the mortagagee
Many a care in the world have we
How can love survive?
Irene: ..WTD.
Gen (ignoring her): You're fond of earrings and you've got a lot
I'm fond of stealing and I need a yacht
Plenty of nothing we haven't got
How can love survive?
There's no rides for us on top of a carriage
Irene: That doesn't rhyme at all.
Gen: In face of political marriage
Irene: That made no sense.
Gen: hush, dearest.
You reach your goals through intelligence
When you look back upon it, there's lots of suspense
Far, far, off the the far beam are we
Quaint and bizarre as a team are we
Two kiddos with a dream are we
Irene: ..kiddos? What?
Gen: (louder) we'll make our love survive.
No little coldwater flat have we
Warmed by a glow of improbability
Up to our necks in security (vague wave towards Cosis, who isn't there)
How can love survive?
Irene blinks rapidly.
Gen: How can I show what I feel for you?
Costis blasts through the door, but his entrance is drowned out by the music.
Gen: (lightbulb above head) I shall go out and steal for you!
Irene: (snaps back) I shall die like Camille for you.
Gen: (face falls) How can love survive?
Costis: MUSIC IS STUPID.
Gen: ...I was about to have a passionate kiss with the queen, thanks a lot, Costis.
Costis: I just thought I should warn you. IT'S OUT FOR YOUR SOUL.
Gen: (nods slowly) I'll keep that in mind.
-to be continued-
The images were haunting me, so I had to write it. Except this is from the Sound of Music...BUT DON'T WORRY, it shall all be revealed in the Plot.
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 06:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 9/27/09 01:19 pm (UTC)Looks like you need to fix your lj cut. Replace the comma with a
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 02:03 pm (UTC)checkers65477 , you can't just type that into a comment because LJ will interpret it as HTML code. I typed it with the magic HTML entity name
ampersand ell tee semicolon
& l t ;
(With spaces between them, they come out as themselves. Without spaces you get
< )
Oh, BTW, Taryn: LMAO. :-D
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 02:11 pm (UTC)Your icon...gah. Can't look at it too long.
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 03:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 9/27/09 03:20 pm (UTC)Second Random Soldier, sotto voce to first: Shouldn't that be alpha, veeta, ghamma?
First Random Solder, s.v. in reply: Yeah, but I had an idea of what he was driving at. Don't want to make him mad, do we?
Second Random Solder, s.v.: Mad-DER. Shh!
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 05:08 pm (UTC)however it did not diminish the overall hilarity of this post.
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 10:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 9/27/09 04:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 9/27/09 05:10 pm (UTC)this is where I lost it. LOLOLOLOL.
also I am tickled about being part of the inspiration for this. ESPECIALLY THAT YOU QUOTED ME IN ALL-CAPS YEP THAT'S ME. :-D
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 05:30 pm (UTC)You are marvelous. Simply marvelous.
no subject
Date: 9/27/09 08:55 pm (UTC)This is SOOOOO funny! LMAO!!!!!!
(thank you, Jade, for being part of the inspiration for this...absolutely hysterical)
no subject
Date: 9/28/09 12:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 9/28/09 07:12 pm (UTC)cried with laughter there. *attempts to breathe normally and wipe face*
For some reason, Teleus strikes me as the type of person that would deny liking singing, but if you get him drunk enough, he won't let go of the mic. Er. If they had mics, I mean.
no subject
Date: 9/29/09 03:38 am (UTC)Geez. This just gets crazier and crazier.
no subject
Date: 9/29/09 12:59 pm (UTC)I imagine Costis soon will be though, at this rate.
no subject
Date: 9/30/09 12:27 am (UTC)Wow. So... who got Teleus so drunk that not only is he singing, but he is teaching others to sing?
no subject
Date: 9/30/09 01:14 pm (UTC)Gen, of course.
no subject
Date: 9/30/09 11:09 pm (UTC)...*facepalm*
Wow! This is almost too much! ....
Date: 10/1/09 04:53 pm (UTC)http://golem.ph.utexas.edu/~distler/blog/archives/000050.html (http://golem.ph.utexas.edu/~distler/blog/archives/000050.html)