[identity profile] agh-4.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] queensthief
 Here's a carol!

We don't really know much about the holidays of Sounis, Eddis, and Attolia (except that there's Hephestia's spring festival, and probably something else that I don't know offhand), so I made up the holiday of Hephestia's Day of Feasting, basically because it has the right amount of syllables.

If you don't know the tune or original lyrics to "The 12 Days of Christmas" ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8Jbi-BBp3c

Hephestia’s Days of Feasting

(to the tune of “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

 

Eddis: 

On Hephestia’s day of feasting, I gave my former Thief 

Allegiance forevermore.

 

Sandy: 

On the second day of feasting, I gave my loathsome king 

Sand in his food

All: 

And allegiance forevermore! 

Ornon: 

On the third day of feasting, I gave Eugenides 

Some glum scowls

 

All: 

Sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Eugenides the god: 

On the fourth day of feasting, I gave the mortal thief 

Protection and a scar
All: 

Some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Costis: 

On the fifth day of feasting, I gave His Majesty 

A BRUISE ON THE LIP!!!!!

 

All: 

Protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore!

 Nobility of Eddis: 

On the sixth day of feasting, we gave Attolia’s king 

Many pairs of earrings

 

All: 

BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Minister of War: 

On the seventh day of feasting, I gave my youngest son 

All his skill at swordplay

 

All: 

Scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Magus: 

On the eighth day of feasting, I gave that viper, Gen 

Knowledge and friendship

 

All: 

Super skills at swordplay, scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Teleus: 

On the ninth day of feasting, I gave the king of kings 

Half the former Queen’s Guard

 

All: 

Knowledge and friendship, killer skills at swordplay, scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Galen: 

On the tenth day of feasting, I gave Eugenides 

Strict ministrations

 

All: 

Half the former Queen’s Guard, knowledge and friendship, awesome skills at swordplay, scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Sophos:

On the eleventh day of feasting, I gave my buddy, Gen 

My heart on a toothpick

 

All: 

Strict ministrations, half the former Queens’s Guard, knowledge and friendship, beastly skills at swordplay, scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food, and allegiance forevermore! 

Attolia: 

On the twelfth day of feasting, I gave Eugenides
Love, trust, and inkpots!

All: 

Hearts on a toothpick, strict ministrations, half the former Queen’s Guard, knowledge and friendship, stunning skills at swordplay, scores of stolen earrings, BRUISE ON THE LIP!, protection and a scar, some glum scowls, sand in his food,

And allegiance forevermore!!!!!

Date: 12/16/10 03:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] checkers65477.livejournal.com
Ok, I was smiling and thinking how great all the lyrics were, then I read:

Sophos: On the eleventh day of feasting, I gave my buddy, Gen

My heart on a toothpick

and squealed like a little girl. :)

(also, can you edit the post and take out all the extra lines of blank space? Thx)

Date: 12/16/10 03:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gamwyn.livejournal.com
Wild applause!! I love it!

Date: 12/16/10 03:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jade-sabre-301.livejournal.com
ME TOO OH MY GOODNESS I LAUGHED SO HARD well first I giggled at "all his skill at swordplay" and then I laughed at "I gave that viper, Gen" but the Sophos line EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK SO ADORABLE

:D :D :D :D

(p.s. looooooooooool bruise on the lip)

Date: 12/16/10 04:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] semisilence.livejournal.com
DUDE that is amazing. I can imagine a chorus line. With Rockettes.

Date: 12/16/10 04:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thelasteddis.livejournal.com
AND THE CROWD GOES WILD

I love how the adjective for "skills at swordplay" changes every time. XD

Date: 12/16/10 05:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stubefied-by-gd.livejournal.com
Allegiance for forever more.
My heart on a toothpick.


The Twelve Days of Christmas is not supposed to make me wibble!

Also, it is making me have The Bad Thought. Not "What would Costis do if Attolis and Attolia ordered him different ways?" but "What would Gen do if he ever had to choose between Attolia and Eddis?" It was one thing when she was his equal as queen, but once she's sworn to him the dynamic changes, and I'm so worried! How did she go so fast from having The Best Country Ever to this? Bad thought! Bad thought! Go away!

Date: 12/16/10 05:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ninedaysaqueen.livejournal.com
Oh gosh, Agh... You are forevermore the most BRILLIANT song parody writer to ever mock a lyric!

How disturbed would people be if I caroled this song all over town at various doorsteps?

Date: 12/16/10 05:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mortalasabee.livejournal.com
I spent some time trying to pick out my favorite verse but I failed. I love it all. Nicely done!

It put me greatly in mind of Eddie Izzard's skit about the 12 days of Christmas song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgSe_gzyM1c
I can just see Costis shouting out "BRUISE ON THE LIP" the way Eddie does it.

Date: 12/16/10 07:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thesehnsucht.livejournal.com
EPIC! I'm learning it now

Date: 12/16/10 06:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drashizu.livejournal.com
This is AWESOME. *adds to memories* You rock!

Date: 12/17/10 03:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amolegere.livejournal.com
"Heart on a toothpick" Awwwww!!! I can tell you what I'm going to be singing this Christmas season!

Date: 12/17/10 03:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] checkers65477.livejournal.com
LJ is so bizarre sometimes. Whenever I have to go and edit that old Readaloud post it's a ridiculous nightmare. The formatting is never right!

Date: 12/17/10 03:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ninedaysaqueen.livejournal.com
Ah, so you ARE trying to get me locked up in Bedlam. Like I need help with that. Do they have Wifi?

Your welcome!

Date: 12/17/10 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stubefied-by-gd.livejournal.com
Gen does have a skewed view, but the peninsular people seem to take this swearing allegiance thing as a pretty big deal. Remember how mad Sophos was at the idea.

"My Queen." The saddest freaking goodbye ever.

When it is all done, the gods had better give Eddis happiness on a silver platter.

Date: 12/17/10 07:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ninedaysaqueen.livejournal.com
DAH! Exactly!

The mental image of a bloody, still beating human heart staked on a toothpick like a hotdog at a barbecue should not bring an aww... how cute smile to my face, but it does. Yeah... My Bedlam sentence is not looking so hot.

Date: 12/17/10 09:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tiegirl.livejournal.com
Okay all you techies out there...with the help of youtube we should (well, you should, since I cannot carry a tune in a bucket) be able to do this. Everyone who can carry a tune, record this in a youtube video and somehow someone who knows how can meld them all together and we can post it as a Sounisian carol. This has to go viral. It is EPIC!

FANTASTIC JOB AGH!!!!

(LOVE THE SWORDPLAY LINES! BUT IT'S ALL SO GOOD)

Date: 12/22/10 07:45 pm (UTC)
filkferengi: (Default)
From: [personal profile] filkferengi
You. Rock.

[cackles in glee upon acquisition of fiendishly clever filk]

Date: 12/22/10 08:11 pm (UTC)
filkferengi: (Default)
From: [personal profile] filkferengi
Also, may I direct your attention to "The Twelve Days Of Star Wars" by [livejournal.com profile] filkertom, near the bottom of the screen:

http://www.tomsmithonline.com/freestuff/index.html

warning: bad puns abound!

Note: that's Tom's [extensive] page of free stuff!

Date: 12/27/10 07:15 pm (UTC)
filkferengi: (Default)
From: [personal profile] filkferengi
Hrrunk. A lot.

Date: 1/17/11 05:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elle-winters.livejournal.com
AGH!

Okay so I saw this post a while back and I was like I have to come back to it, bcause i was in exams and what not

sooooo


AGH YOU ARE SO AWESOME I LOVE IT!!!!

THIS IS BRILLIANT!!!!

<3 YOU
AND THIS SONG>


FOREVERMORE!\


elle

Date: 8/19/11 08:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theorangethief.livejournal.com
So i was just going back through posts and saw this...
OMG I LUVETH YOU!!!
awwww heart on a toothpick!!

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Eddis, Attolia, Sounis

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