Attolia's Latest Flame

[dannybailey.livejournal.com]

This is complete crack, but when I heard "Peron's Latest Flame" from Evita, I just knew I had to tweak it to fit the Queen's Thief books. It's so wonderfully appropriate, although I did remove some lines and change others a bit. :)

If your aren't familiar with the musical "Evita," the song I'm talking about can be watched here on YouTube

and the lyrics are here on stlyrics.

So I present, as narrated by Relius and Costis,


ATTOLIA'S LATEST FLAME

[Relius:]At the watering holes of the well-to-do
I detect a resistance to
[Aristocrats:] Precisely
[Relius:] Our hero's style
[Aristocrats:] We're glad you noticed

[Relius:] The shooting sticks of the upper-class
[Aristocrats:] Give him an inch
[Relius:] Aren't supporting a single ass
That would rise for the king
[Aristocrats:] He'll take a mile

[Aristocrats:]
Such a shame he wandered into our enclosure
How unfortunate this person has forced us to be blunt
No we wouldn't mind seeing him in Eddis
But behind the royal throne, not in front

[Costis:] Could there be in our fighting corps
A lack of enthusiasm for
[Army:] Exactly
[Costis:] Attolia's latest flame
[Army:] You said it brother

[Costis:]
Should you wish to cause great distress
In the tidiest officer's mess
Just mention his name

[Army:]
That isn't funny

Attolia is a fool, breaking every taboo
Allowing a Eddisan in the army H.Q.
And he's an Thief, the last straw

The evidence suggests
He has other interests
If it's her who's using him
He's exceptionally dim

[Aristocrats:]
We have allowed ourselves to slip
We have completely lost our grip
We have declined to an all-time low
Thieves have become the set to know

[Army:]
It's no crime for royalty to do as they please
As long as they're discreet and keep clear of disease
We ignore, we disregard
But once she allows a boy half her size
To move to the center where he's not qualified
We are forced to mark her card

[Army:]
He won't be kept happy by her nights on the tiles
He says that he loves her, but he's after her files
So get back on to the street

[Aristocrats:]
Things have reached a pretty pass
When someone pretty lower-class
Graceless and vulgar, uninspired
Can be accepted and admired